Forgiveness is not enablement

June Hunt concludes Chapter 9 of How to Forgive by focusing on three points illustrating that forgiveness is not enablement.  Ms. Hunt stresses that there isn’t anything noble or godly about giving irresponsible people additional opportunities to take advantage of you.  Furthermore, God assuredly doesn’t want you to facilitate others’ irresponsible behaviors.

1.  Enablement means putting yourself in a position of being offended again and again.  Forgiving the person who hurt you is one thing.  Subjecting yourself to further harm is another.

2.  Enabling never helps offenders change but further ingrains their bad habits.  As June notes, enabling “only perpetuates a destructive pattern of pummeling.”  If you overtly or implicitly indicate it is okay for your offender to continue his/her inappropriate behavior, you are giving permission for the offender to repeat wrongdoing.

3.  Enablers are classic people pleasers who don’t know when they should say no.  When you say ‘yes’ to irresponsible people when you should be saying ‘no’, in reality your are actually saying no to Christ.  In Galatians 2:10, the apostle Paul said, “Am I now trying to win the approval of men, or of God?  Or am I trying to please men?  If I were still trying to please men, I would not be a servant of Christ.”

When you are an enabler, it is quite possible you subvert God’s will for your life as well as the life of your offender.  June adds:

“God never expects us to put ourselves in harm’s way when someone who hurts us shows no remorse.”

Even if your offender refuses to forgive, your bag still can be boulder-free!

Today’s question: How has Ms. Hunt enabled you to realize that forgiveness is not enablement?  Please share.

Tomorrow’s blog: “Prayer redirects our hearts”

 

Forgiveness is not enablement

Faith is whispering yes

“Logic is screaming no; faith is whispering yes.”- Mark Batterson

In Chapter 5 (“Cloudy with a Chance of Quail”) of The Circle Maker, Mark Batterson sates that drawing prayer circles often looks “like an exercise in foolishness.”  Exercising faith involves the willingness to look foolish.  This is directly proportional to the size of the circle you draw.

Pastor Batterson believes that you have to take a risk to experience a miracle- and rising your reputation is one of the most difficult risks to take.  But the moment will come when you need to make the call or make the move.  Failure to take the risk means forfeiting the miracle.

When God promised the Israelites meat for a month, Moses did the mental math- and the numbers didn’t add up.  Moses had to choose whether or not to circle God’s promise of meat.  This was a defining decision in Moses’ life.  Mark describes how defining decisions lead to defining moments:

“You are only one defining decision away from a totally different life.  One defining decision can change your trajectory and put you on a path toward the Promised Land. . . . And it’s those defining decisions that become the defining moments of our lives.”

By human calculation, God’s will never does add up.  Even though Moses found it inconceivable for God to keep His promise of quail, that isn’t our business.  That’s God’s business.  Our problem, Mark points out, is that “too often we let how get in the way of what God wants us to do.”  To experience awesome moments involves putting ourselves in “this is crazy” situations.

Faith is whispering yes.

Today’s question: When facing humanly impossible situations, does logic or faith dictate your response?  Please share.

Tomorrow’s blog: “Arguments with God”

 

Faith is whispering yes

The right course of action

“Whenever we have an opportunity, let us work for the good of all.”- Galatians 6:10 (NRSV)

“Never try to choose the right course of action in the wrong frame of mind.”- John Ortberg

John Ortberg continues his discussion of some ways God’s wisdom can lead us to, as well as help us through, open doors we encounter.

2.  Practice on small doors.  Pastor Ortberg cautions us not to wait to ask for wisdom until we’re facing a major decision.  Practicing on small doors develops our ability to choose wisely when big decisions come.  Plus, small door opportunities are everywhere.  John concludes:

“Choosing doors always involves a process: I recognize opportunity, identify options, evaluate, choose, and learn.”

3.  Allow time and energy for big decisions.  Pastor Ortberg states that one reason why “finding God’s will for my life” is so problematic is that we’re overwhelmed by the many choices we must make:

“We think having more choices means more freedom, and more freedom means better living.  But having too many choices does not produce liberation, it produces paralysis.”

Open door people seek simplicity in their lives so that their finite supply of willpower is saved for the most important decisions.  John adds that wise people shepherd their choosing energy well and never make important decisions unless they’re experiencing “the peace of God, which transcends all[human] understanding.”- Philippians 4:7

Today’s question: How have you increased your awareness of small door opportunities?  Please share.

Tomorrow’s blog: “What’s your problem?”

 

The right course of action

Moments of divine opportunity

John Ortberg concludes Chapter 1 of All the Places to Go with the observation that God’s primary interest is character-formation, not circumstance-shaping:

“God’s primary will for your life is not the achievement you accrue; it’s the person you become.  God’s primary will for your life is not what job you ought to take; it’s not primarily situational or circumstantial. . . . God’s primary will for your life is that you become a magnificent person in his image, somebody with the character of Jesus.  That is God’s main will for your life.  No circumstance can change that.”

Because God is in the open door business, that means a new way of (a) looking at God; (b) looking at life; (c) looking at myself; and (d) choosing.  Every moment provides the opportunity to find a door that opens into God and His presence.  Even though we may go through the “wrong door” with the right heart, God can use that experience.

Pastor Ortberg states that we need to train ourselves to search for and respond to moments of divine opportunity if we want to experience more of the Spirit of God in our lives.  God’s open doors must not be met with our closed hearts.  The open door leads to the place where God guides.

Today’s question: What moments of divine opportunity have you experienced following your vocation loss?  Please share.

Tomorrow’s blog: “Staytheists”

 

Moments of divine opportunity